Tuesday, October 16, 2012

New Town #1: Peter Hammond, Detective

Hello, I am the Doll.  I am an interactive aid between the Newton and the rest of the world.  The Newton has asked me to relate some of the more interesting cases in our fine New Town.  The Newton hopes you find it both entertaining and educational about the conditions of many of the New Humans.

Peter Hammond was a fairly successful Private Detective and a very failed human when it came to marital affairs.  Before the Detonation he had left a wake of three divorces, four affairs, five children and one of those born out of wedlock.  It wasn't that Peter didn't love, but that he loved both unwisely and with all the concentration of a child with ADD given candy and red bull.

When the Detonation occurred Peter was one of those people who effectively no longer existed.  The universe had to quickly decide if his wives were married to anyone, if they had children and many other things that the universe seems to find highly annoying.  Peter himself was in a pocket universe and at that moment, which lasted five years, he was a rabbit.  He rather enjoyed that but had an aching suspicion he was something more, or perhaps less he couldn't decide.

The Newton brought Peter back, but even the Newton had limits.  Did Peter exist?  Did he not?  Was he human or rabbit?  Despite best efforts the universe decided in effect to split the difference.  When Peter Hammond came back it was in the form of a big blue humanoid rabbit.

New Town is not as stable as the Newton would like.  One section tends to attract those with are a little sad and bitter with how things have turned out.  Colors there are faded.  The music is sad, and the women are mysteries.  The people who live there call it the Breakers and it has more bars than any other part of town.  That is where Peter Hammond now lives.  In the Breakers, not in the bars . . . well not all the time.

He's still a detective.  He's still had three wives and five children.  But most humans won't hire a rabbit, and it's a little hard to be subtle when you are seven feet tall (counting ears) and blue.  His wives now have even less  to do with him, and won't let him see the children.  The courts will take years to decide if humanoid rabbits have any custody rights so maybe Peter has a right to be a little bitter.

It's not all bad though.  He can hear a snitch snitching at ten miles away with those big baby blue ears of his.  He's also fast on his feet and can leap up to ten feet straight up.  Also, if you value your internal organs don't let him kick you.  Also a big blue rabbit in a bar is absurd, but in a rather charming way.  People trust him, talk to him.  He knows a lot of New Town's little secrets and has lots of contacts.  He's even working on a Mrs. Hammond mark 4.

Maybe this time it will all work out.  The universe can be funny that way.

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