Attack of the Giant Monsters

In the nineties they went and remade the Gamera series to great success.  It's hard to believe the mileage you can get from a giant, flame throwing turtle but there you go.  Still as good as the later films are, they don't have the incredible fun badness of the original Gamera films.  Attack of the Giant Monsters AKA Gamera Vs. Gyaos which is the very best of a very bad lot.

After a series of volcanic eruptions Gamera returns to Japan to sup up on good ol' geo thermal energy (Gamera is green dudes!)  Kid in short pants everywhere in Japan are happy that their favorite mascoto is back.  Scientists being scientists want to prod so they go in a toy helicopter to see what they can see.  They are surprised though when a volcano throws energy beams at them splitting the copter in two.  No worries, no one seems to care much.

Meanawhile, a road is being built dang it.  It will be built whether there are volcanic eruptions, or giant turtles dang it.  So it is willed in Tokyo.  So the guy on site and his two boobs get to work.  Farmers though are hating.  So they say you no build the road unless we get maximum green.  Greedy farmers.  Short pants kid doesn't care and would rather explore the strange green glow in the mountains.  He is joined by a less than heroic journalist.  There they discover Gyaos. 

Gyaos is like a big bat.  A big bat with an old fashion iron for a head.  A big bat that shoots out laser like beams.  A big bat that eats little journalists.  Bye journalist.  You won't be missed.  Gamera though pops up before Gyaos can eat the kid.  Gyaos doesn't like Gamera's fire but has a built in fire extinguisher system.  Gamera doesn't have an anti laser system.  Gamera loses in a really bloody fight.

Luckily scientist listen to Short Pants Kid who knows EVERYTHING about monsters.  Turns out that Gyaos likes long walks in the park, drinking blood, but doesn't like the sun.  With these facts in hand they come up with the silliest trap invented since the days of scooby doo.  They fill a big (REALLY BIG) bowl full of blood and put it on a merry go round.  They hope to make Gyaos too dizzy to fly.

Luckily Gamera heals himself and comes back and kicks Gyaos butt.  The farmers and the road crew become friends.  Everyone loves the Short Pants Kid.  Scientists are smug.  The world is good.  A perfect Gamera film.