Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol

I have to steel myself to watch a Tom Cruise movie.  I just don't like the man.  He gives off jerk vibes to me.  The trouble is, more often than not they are good films and I end up liking them despite myself.  One near exception to that rule has been the Mission Impossible series.  The first three films have been I would call "hot messes."  Sure they have some stand out scenes, but over all they are examples of when style shouldn't be over substance.  "Ghost Protocol" is the first film of the series that I can say I like from beginning to end.

Starting in a Russian jail and then roaming around the world, it's the story of how the IMF is implicated in bombing the Kremlin and is forced to shut down.  They can't though because a rogue terrorist has the power to order up nuclear strikes and doesn't seem at all afraid to use it.  There's also a sense of a personal grudge match since they have already lost agents because of this crisis.  So Ethan Hunt and what's left of his gang (including a very amusing Simon Pegg) are all that's left between us and nuclear Armageddon. 

The team and plans seem to work very well and aren't as gimmicky as in other mission impossible films.  The actions scenes are across the board excellent.  I love the scenes in Dubai because they keep building suspense with the help of an on coming sand storm.  You keep waiting for that sucker to hit and you aren't disappointed.  Definitely a film worth watching.

Yakuza Weapon

Well this is another one of those Japanese are weird shows.  It's the type of show that when someone gets offed while talking on the phone pink gore splashes the listeners half a town away.  Now that's 4g!  Directed by the same insane fellow who did "Versus," "Tokyo Gore Police," and "Mutant Girl Squad."  Normal is not in this man's vocabulary. 

The Yakuza are basically the Japanese mafia.  They tend to run things by being rude and loud.  Which tends to screw with typical Japanese person's sense of civility.  When they have to, they can also get violent specially among each other.  Generally if you see a guy in loud clothes, covered in tattoos and swaggering like a drunken samurai you are probably looking at some low level Yakuza goon.

Our story involves the crazy son of one of the heads of Yakuza family.  He's raw and rude and so father basically told him to get out of town.  So we see sonny boy having fun in a war zone with some of his friends/toadies.  A government agent comes by and tells him daddy is dead.  Son of course wants vengeance even if Daddy was a son of a bitch so he comes back to Tokyo.  There he finds there's a new head of the Yakuza who ordered Daddy dead and is three shades of slime.  He also meets the girl he had promised to marry and forgot about doing a "Blues Brothers' retreat."  She's not so easily cowed and hits him with a boat and puts the moves on him till she is kidnapped by slimey and forced to wear a Japanese school girl uniform.

This is basically the half time show and it's brilliant.  The villain has put a fighter on each of the 38 levels of his building between the main lobby and him.  No way this kid can beat them all.  In a serious case of mad lateral thinking though our hero takes a page from Wile E. Coyote and uses enough dynamite sticks to wipe out the 38 levels between them.  Beating a hasty retreat our villain takes out our hero with a gunship.  Luckily the government agent is around and they can rebuild him.  They can make him louder, ruder, and more obnoxious than ever.  He's now cyber Yakuza.

The rest is insane gun play at level 12.  It's certainly not a perfect film, but it moves in such a blur that it's hard not to get carried away by it.  Certainly fun for any person that values weird cinema.

The Scorpion King 3: The Battle For Redemption

My light of my life told me she was going to watch "2012," and I said "Well, that's good cheese love." She was confused for a second thinking that I didn't like it. So I explained that I liked it fine because it is cheesy. Sometimes a film will just take such a flight for reality and logic that you can only admire the results. This brings us to the Scorpion King. The entire series is based in cheese like the Wisconsin economy. The third movie in the series has just intesified the cheese factor to an almost nuclear level.

I had a most excellent time watching it.

Now let's get aside the bad. The script. Sucks. The plot. Cliched and sucks. The story is the usual got to go fetch the magic dingus from the bad guy before he can rule the land bwahahahaha. The worst thing, though, sadly is Billy Zane's acting. Now there is cheesy over acting, and there is just smirking. Billy Zane, in this film you did smirk mightly. It was like Billy Zane was in a totally different picture and was not made aware that he was acting with others. He even in spots referenced the acting style of Jim Carey in the Ace Ventura movies. I swear, it's the truth, he did it and he shouldn't have. Billy, if you are reading this, all is forgiven based on past performances but please learn to act with others.

So the good. Victor Webster did not suck as the Scorpion King. He had a light touch to his role, but didn't lose touch of the sad back story of the Scorpion King. He not only looked like he could handle the action scenes, but he seemed to be having a heck of a time. His buddy was even more fun. Boston Christopher played Olaf, a misplaced Viking with much humor and energy. I really want to see more of this guy.

Also, just let me say that the warfare scenes were impressive for a production of this size. Using a lot of practical effects and more extras than I thought they could afford they really did give a good feel for warfare of the period.

The film was exciting and humorous. It's still cheese but it's a darn good slice.

catch .44

Quentin Tarantino!  This film, this mess is all your fault!  I know you didn't have anything to do with it, but still karmically it's your damn fault.  Just like every cheap jack zombie flick is George Romero's bastard child, every hipsterish caper film with bizarre dialogue and random violence is the bastard child of Pulp Fiction.  It makes you wonder if it is worth watching a great film if you know it is going to unleash a flood of poorly conceived rip offs.

For the record this is a gang of girls (oooo different) who are sent by Mel (Bruce Willis calling in a role and saving what ever dignity he has left) to get some drug money.  It's all a set up, and they find themselves in stand off between an idiot with a gun and a motor mouth professional killer.  Like Pulp Fiction the time line is fractured, though in this case in a willy nilly fashion that makes no real sense.

The actors try hard.  Even a Tarantino knock off is fun for actors.  But the script is nowheresville.  It is just a long slow ride to nowhere.  TARANTINO I BLAME YOU!!!!

Flypaper

"Flypaper" is a fun little action mystery movie.  It's set at a bank that is about to reset its security system.  Why it does so with customers in the bank is a bit of a flaw in my book, but hey maybe they are really tied to office hours.  Anyway, a rather manic person comes in asking for change.  He's charming and he flirts with a bank teller who unfortunately for our manic guy turns out to be in the process of getting married judging from all the gifts she has behind the counter.

Then the bank robbers come in.

Then the bank robbers come in.

That wasn't redundant.  TWO sets of bankrobbers choose this exact time to rob the bank.  One set is smooth as silk and have all the high tech equipment you'd expect to see in a "Mission Impossible" film.  The other set is a pair of Jethros who just want to blow the hell out some ATMs.  There's something of a standoff and a customer gets killed before they decide to split up the bank.  They gather everyone else and put them in a small room of hostages.

There are three things now that will impede the perfect bank robbery.  The first thing is the Jethro gang.  To say they aren't too bright would be an understatement.  Nice boys, but just not all there.  Plus their philosophy that you can't use too much C4 leads to trouble.  The second problem is our manic guy, he's not just charmingly eccentric.  Without his meds he becomes a full scale flake.  But a BRILLIANT flake like sherlock holmes on just a little meth.  He's convinced that there is a third party involved.  He's also convinced they are all going to die if he doesn't figure things out.  His constant breaking out from the rest of the hostages gives our bank robbers a constant headache.

The third problem is there really is a third party.  Of that though I will say no more.

This was a fast, jazzy film.  The actors really seemed to enjoy their roles.  The script was well done, and I really can't think of one bad thing to say about the film.

The Assassination Game

Jean Claude Van Damme was the perfect unknowning joke of the eighties action hero. Stuck with an inability to act, and a thick accent, he also lacked the charm of another eighties hero who had the same limitations. Van Damme was the perfect storm of the eighties, a bad mish mashed monster of Ahnold and Seagal with the world's worst signature. Ahnold at least had a pithy line he'd sneak into his movies. Van Damme's signature was the ability to do the perfect splits. Yeah, that would fill me with pants wetting terror if I was some pony tail wearing eighties terrorist. "Looky there," I would say, "there's a man with no fear of being kicked in the balls."

Time has been no kinder to Van Damme than the critics. He might have had craggy good looks but they have eroded badly like a sea cliff. Luckily, or perhaps cunningly, Van Damme has found a picture that is perfect for him. In "The Assassination Game," he plays an alienated hitman who lives in the world's greatest secret apartment. He lives an alternate lifestyle where facial expressions are not required. On the other end of the spectruum is a young passionate hitman. He's not in the game anymore, but gets back in when the man who raped his wife is released by the authorities. Some of these authorities are corrupt interpol agents who lost a lot of money to the hip hitman and are hoping to draw him out.

All three forces converge at the same time. The results are a complete snafu. Van Damme manages to kill the scumwad's brother instead of his target. The Hip hitman almost shoots Van Damme in the head and is himself shot in the arm by the corrupt interpol agents. Obviously, this is not going to work as is so Hip hitman and Van Damme decide to work together even though they really don't trust each other.

Meanwhile, at the secret apartment, Van Damme gets a new neighbor. Some low level punk and drug dealer who is busy abusing his girlfriend. Van Damme would rather play the violin but eventually gets drawn into the drama. Can the girl open Van Damme's heart? Well she gets his turtle to poke out its head, and no that's not sexual metaphor.

The rest of the movie plays out between these two stories and it's no surprise that eventually Van Damme decides to join the human race after a fashion. As he says, "If you don't love anything, can you say you ever lived?" A nice sentiment from a film about blowing bigger holes in people, but I like it. The action was decent, Van Damme for once was well used (you can't say acting and Van Damme in the same sentence [oh wait I just did...oh well]), and it had the sweetest secret apartment ever. I'm getting one of those!

Little Big Soldier

I loved Jackie Chan before I even saw Jackie Chan. I read about his career first and saw a documentary about him before I saw any of his films. I was impressed by incredibly insane stunt work. When I finally got to see his original Hong Kong films like Project A I was not disappointed. I also saw he had a flair for physical comedy not seen since the days of the great silent film stars. For many years his films just got better and better and one became used to seeing Jackie one up himself.

Then he got old.

Actually I wish I could blame Chris Tucker, but even he isn't totally to blame for the fall off in the quality of the work of Jackie Chan. To be honest, Jackie reached that awkward point where he was still trying to cash checks his body could no longer write. Add to that a real push to be an american star so that he wasn't being careful in what projects he was signing up with, and you have a recipe for disaster. Honestly, the words "A new Jackie Chan film," just became too painful to me. I considered just striking him off my list of things to watch and just celebrate his golden age.

Then I saw "Little Big Soldier."

Now, this isn't like the "Gone of the Wind" of Fu films, but it's a good solid film that tells a story that is amusing. Here Jackie is fine comic form. He's a professional soldier, but only so much as he shows up on the field. THere he plays dead and loots around after the battle. This time he looks into an enemy general wounded but alive. He takes the general cross country hoping to present him for a rich reward. Of course the course of true greed never runs true. There are others who want the general and various pitfalls along the mountain pathways.

This is a lovely film, something you don't often say about a Jackie Chan film. It has wonderful color. Jackie as I said is really acting well and his co stars are a fine match. The fighting is good but not overwhelming and film is well paced. Definitely worth a watch and I hope this puts Jackie back in the groove.

Last Night's Thundercats

So far the new Thundercats has been a pretty high quality revamp of the original, but it was last night's episode that made me really fall in love with the show. Now, plot wise it wasn't too different. The Cats are on the run from the Lizard army, but they take time out to help a bunch of little leafy people that sort of look like the Whos in the animated "The Grinch that Stole Christmas." They even sung choir.

Now as I said, this isn't a big stretch plotwise on the face of it. It's the standard "Help the person of the week" plot of nearly all action shows. It's the little details though that make it shine. See, these little guys they have little lives. They live a whole life in a day. Lion-o has to live an entire relationship with a friend in a day. From being teacher, to rival, to boon friend, and of course all relationships do end. This episode wasn't afraid to pull on the heart strings. Pull? Hell, it was yanking on them like Tarzan in a vine factory.

You think getting a grown man teary eyed would be enough for a cartoon, but no. They had a great double ending. After helping their leafy friends the cats realize they can't run forever from the Lizards, so the meet them head on. But it looks like they can't win. Suddenly from out of the dark comes a car that would make Bruce Wayne kick a bat. The day is saved and vehicle opens to reveal... Panthro!

Damn this was a good show!

The Warrior's Way

This film is a big slice of hokey from the get go, and if you can't get behind it don't even bother. This is a modern day version of "Kung Fu," done up Hong Kong style with a side order of Japanoweirdness. Our hero has spent his life learning to be the best swordsman ever. After defeating the previous best swordsman ever, he suddenly feels hollow. Only a laughing baby he was contracted to kill makes him happy. So he leaves his fellowship of assassins and takes the baby to america. There he goes to a ghost town full of circus performers looking for an old friend. The friend had passed on but he finds peace in simple but odd community. Unfortunately, bandits and the assassins decide eventually to rain holy hell down on the town and only his sword can save everybody.

Yes the message is as hokey as any sixties hippy movie. Growing flowers is better than killing people. How profound. But, in the end it works it really does. This film is just five shades of beautiful. It both rocks and rolls and it always has something interesting. I liked how the main female character isn't a "traditional" hollywood beauty, but is just full of life and spunk. The casting is just all around great. I really have nothing bad to say about this movie. Seriously!

13 Assassins

A real problem with many forms of government concerns relations. Oh sure you might have a mighty king, but what about his brother? In "13 Assassins" we have a mighty shogun and his less than mighty relation. Well, he's mighty in that he has a lot of troops related to him, but he's a PR nightmare waiting to happen. He's the sort that will rape a newlywed wife then kill the husband, just cause. Obviously, you can't have this moron walking around. Unfortunately, you can't just tell him to go home.

Because of this, a group of samurai come up with a plan to take him out without having to make it official. They track his movements, guide them, and eventually have him enter a small town. A town they have rigged up with death traps. It's going to be 13 samurai versus 200 warriors. I pity the warriors.

This is an incredibly visual film. It is also well thought out. It is its own film and an homage to the "Seven Samurai." Really, when you consider everything, lighting, photography, acting... well it's just incredible. It is by far the best film involving flaming bulls ever.

Hobo With A Shotgun

A lot of folks are leery of violence in the media. Studies do seem to indicate that it might not be the best thing for you. But then neither is fine wine, or a really good ham. Sometimes you just have to weigh the negatives and then say "What the hell." Of course there is always overdoing a thing. It's one thing to have a glass of pinot, it's another thing to wear a box of wine on your head, before it gets emptied. Still, if you are able to handle it, for absolute overkill in violence for the year 2011 I give you dear readers "Hobo with a shotgun."

Starring Rutger Haur as the Hobo, the movie does not have the plot line of a Russian novel. Our hobo drops into a town. All he wants to do is scratch enough money for a lawn mower so he can make a little more money. The American dream really. But the town is full of low lifes, no lower lifes, no no the lowest lifes you can think of. These are the guys that love taking off heads in the middle of the street because they know they are invulnerable. Our Hobo saves a hooker from their mitts and gets beaten up and stabbed by both the cops and the thugs for his trouble. Finally, fed up with it all he takes the money he has and buys a shot gun and he is NOT shy in using it. Anyone that is even a bit scummy winds up with a shotgun up against their head.

The people have a new hero!

But it can't last forever, the bad guys decide that the only way to take care of the Hobo is to become even more freaky evil and scare the town so badly that the town will hunt the Hobo down. A few choice events like taking a flamethrower to a school bus full of kids and their plan starts to work. It all ends in epic carnage as the Hobo reloads.

Really folks, trust me here. This is violence on violence with a dollop of violence on top. It is not for the everybody, and probably shouldn't be for anyone. After that being said though, it is stylish, it moves like greased lightning, and it has a sick sense of humor. Accept no other armed homeless person!

Sucker Punch

"Sucker Punch"  is a film I've been wanting to see.  Then after the reviews, I was dreading to see it.  Finally, I manned up and put the disc into the player.  Ultimately, while a bit confused, I wasn't disappointed.  The story is pretty much in the trailer.  Baby Doll (yeah there's an empowering name) is suffering.  Her mama died and her stepfather was real mean.  So she fought back, and for her trouble she's now in a nutter museum about to get a frontal lobotomy.  Her only chance is to escape, and she enters a fantasy world to do so.

Ok, I realized early on this is a film where one should not be thinking while watching it.  Look at the pretty pictures and don't think about it.  Let's take a crucial part of the movie as an example.  Now in "Real" life Baby Doll seems to have the ability to nearly hypnotize with her dancing (we don't see her dance).  The plan in reality is she dances and the other girls steal the things they need.  Now how does that relate to the dream world where they are fighting a dragon in a helicopter?  The short answer boys and girls is that it does not.  There is no A to B here.  So the easiest thing to do here is not to think about things.

Another thing not to think about is the sexual politics of the movie.  Why set it in a psychiatric hospital and whore house?  Why the stripper names?  Why oh why, fighting in high heels?  Some folks have a thing about noise in space.  Me, it's fighting in high heels.  Trust me people you'd get better results fighting with a pole up your butt (don't ask).  Obviously this film was made by men, and though they might have a fig leaf of crediblity as subtext, it is still an excuse to see a girl in a school girl uniform two sizes two small kicking ass.  I am a man, so I must admit I approve on some level so I will not think how this is a gross injustice to female characters everywhere.

So, when you stop thinking it becomes a fairly interesting film.  Each "adventure" is exciting and well staged.  And how can you not love steam nazis?  Or robots with big pink bunnies painted on them?  There is a wealth, a mish mosh, a tsunami of ideas and images so thick you really do need to go back and watch parts again.  I loved how each section is prefaced by the Wiseman.  He gives the perimeters of the mission, gives a corny motivational statement then says.. "One more thing.." and gives a cryptic clue.  Great fun!

One thing I have to tip my hat off to is the use of the music.  Starting with "Sweet Dreams," is just classy and amusing when the scene changes the LENNOX sanitarium.  I had to say that using Bjork's "Army of Me" was brilliant and I could see it as nothing else but as a shout out to soul sister "Tank Girl."  The rest of the music is of the same high standard and is an organic part of the film.  Kudos there to the director.

Generally I enjoyed myself, if a little guiltily at times.  Definitely worth a look.

Season of the Witch

Ok, I could watch Ron Perlman run around with a sword for two hours.  That's it.  No plot, no dialog, just Ron Perlman, sword, and people to run it through.  Ok, sounds vaguely gay I know I know, but it's just my deep intense infatuation with Ron "Yes I am Hellboy" Perlman.  So for the first five minutes of "Season of the Witch," I was a happy camper.  Nicholas Cage and Ron "Yeah I kicked ass in Blade 2" Perlman are crusaders doing what they do best.  Eventually Nicholas Cage grows a conscience and decides he doesn't like killing women and children even if they are pagans.  The Church though has one last job for him though.  Seems like there's this really bad plague, and there's this girl who is maybe a witch.  So to stop the plague they have to take the girl to the book of solomon so the proper magic words can be spoken.  On the way our heroes face many threats some seemingly supernatural in flavor.

Ok, good news is that Nick Cage and Ron "I was the Beast" Perlman are having some fun which keeps things lively.  The film looks great for the most part, and at the end there's something of a minor twist.  The bad news is this has a major case of the sillies.  Really, don't think of all the plot holes and illogic.  It will make your head explode like a star trek computer.  So this isn't bad as long as you don't think.

Legend of the Fist

Right now this his kung fu the way kung should be fu'd. Set when Japan occupied China it's a sprawling story of one man fighting oppression. In a lot of ways it has the graze notes of zorro. By day (and most nights) our hero is stylish half owner of a night club. But when trouble rears up our dandy puts on what looks like Kato's better duds and fights crime as the legendary warrior.

Look this a beautiful film. It's a well acted film. It has an interesting script that weaves history with everybodies spying on somebody plot. But, let's be truth, you want to know about the kung fu. The kung fu is strong. The kung fu very strong.

Cross

Cross is one of those interesting failures of an independent movie.  It doesn't quite do what it wants, but it does enough and shows enough heart that you don't feel too cheated.  Basically a superhero film on the cheap, it's about a fellow named Cross who has a magic green cross passed down through the generations.  It makes him bullet proof and other powers.  He is fighting against crime bosses and an unkillable viking who are trying to get an ancient staff of mass destruction to work.

In truth, Cross isn't that great of a superhero.  Neither his power or character is really that exciting.  What works is all his friends.  He has an entire cabal of trained fighters that work with him.  They all have cute code names and different styles of fighting.  The stand out is Jake Busey who is labeled (Literally) "Comedic Explosion Master." 

Definitely nice casting helps this movie.  Robert Carradine, Jake Busey, and others make for some interesting combinations.  Also, the general style is nice, you can see these folks have watched both "Heroes" and "The Cape."  The script drags in places and the action scenes aren't as good as they could be, I think they could have done with a better editor.  Still, I'm pretty sure this is no worse than the "Green Lantern."

Battle: Los Angeles

Some folks complained when this first came out that "Battle:  Los Angeles" was a little light plot wise.  I suppose that's true.  There's not much back story, character development, and all that.  But really it doesn't need it.  The title is "Battle"  Los Angeles" and that's exactly what it is about.  Aliens have come to kick our ass and kick it good.  Our heroes are a mix of marines and civilians who are trying to survive and find some weakness in these invaders.  Do you really need a plot, or a love interest, or anything else?  This is basically one fine tuned action sequence with slow spots just so you can catch your breath. 

The aliens are a little iffy to me.  We are told they are powered by water, which seems like not the best source of power.  Also the weapondry seems to vary in both power and accuracy.  On the other hand I like how they build up.  They fall as drop ship/meteors and come out as infantry at first.  Then they start building up their command structure and technology and soon they are followed by flying drones and heavy artillary.

Certainly, all doubts aside, this is an exciting war film with a science fiction flavor.  Well worth watching if you need your adrenaline pumped up!

Drive Angry

I've been catching reviews of this for months and good or bad each review has made me want to see this incredible film. I can appreciate high art, I can appreciate the subtle drama. But at heart, I like my films big and stupid. I want the guiding principle to be "over the top." I want "Big Trouble in Little China," I want "Buckaroo Banzai," I want "Robocop," and I want "Bitch Slap."

I want "Drive Angry."

I am happy to say I was not disappointed. Nick Cage is our hero, or perhaps anti hero is a better term. He's escaped from hell because a bunch of funky satanist plans to sacrifice his daughter. He hooks up with Amber Heard who's a hot chick with a muscle car, and they are off to the races. Ol' Nick is being followed by the Accountant from Hell played by William Fictner, and that's all the plot you need buckaroos. Just cinch up and settle down to watch cars and guns go boom boom.

Now Nick Cage has chosen to act the whole thing in mono mode. Actually this is a smart play as it helps anchor the craziness. Also it helps sell lines that would have just been spittle richness if Cage was in his manic mode. Really, you have to underplay a line like, "I never disrobe before a gun battle." Specially if you are saying this line as you are drinking Jack Daniels and having hot sex. I have seen heroes drink, have sex, and kill bad guys, but I don't recall seeing anyone else do it AT THE SAME TIME.

William Fictner is clearly called upon the spirit of Christopher Walken for his performance as the Accountant. There's just no way to describe how is choice of missing a beat here or changing emphasis there turns lines into pure gold. He plays the Accountant of Hell both cool and bemused. Humans are clearly more evil than any devil and he knows it. He actually likes Nick Cage, but a jobs a job and what are you going to do?

Again, watch this film. Watch it in large groups if you can. Enjoy!

Street Fighter

Roger Ebert might argue that video games can never be art.  Fans may argue which adaption from a video game came the closest to capturing what made the game so compelling (for my money that would be "Silent Hill"), but for my money the one adaption that was the most fun is "Street Fighter."  It gleefully doesn't make a lick of sense.  It shambles, rambles, runs a full tilt boogie from one silly situation to another trying to shoe horn in every character from the game. 

It's great.

Does Jean-Claude Van Damme successfully play an american soldier?  Not even.  Does it matter?  Not at all.  Even Mr. Dour here can't stop the fun as Colonel Guile.  The good Colonel is leading a UN style force into the asian nation of Shadalo.  The reason is to stop the mad, mad, mad M. Bison played with zest by Raul Julia.  In between this rock and a hard body is everyone else from black marketeers, con men, and cute journalists seeking revenge. 

The actual kung fu is of only middling quality.  The mix of actors really couldn't allow for Jackie Chan style craziness.  But the characters square off nicely and there's a nice balance and flow.  What really anchors the film is Julia who brings a sort of crazed dignity to a character who thinks its sound fiscal strategy to plan to kidnap the Queen of England.  Definitely a guilty pleasure I don't feel a shred of guilt in watching. 

We sorely miss you Mr. Julia.

Green Hornet

Seth Rogen is very much something of the flavor of the week. No fault to him (well except for taking the checks), he's a talented soul that audience are, at least at the moment, responding too. The trouble is, when you are in such demand there is the temptation to either do the exact same thing over and over and over again (I'm looking at you Adam Sandler), or to take on projects that aren't exactly your thing. I thought that the "Green Hornet" was an example of such a mismatch that would implode on it's own improbablities.

I forgot that Michael Keaton played batman.

I'm not saying that Seth here shows the same depth that Michael did, but I can say he was very much the heart of the picture wich is even more improbable given Seth's usual comic range. The story is familiar. Our hero is the son of a famed news paper publisher and never got on well with his father. He becomes something of a playboy party hound to distance himself from his father. Then his dad dies, and he realizes that when you define yourself by "I'm not my dad," it all becomes hollow when there is no more dad.

Now milling around in a huge house, and going to work in a place he really doesn't understand, he's left with this need to DO SOMETHING. DO SOMETHING GREAT. And here is where Kato comes in. Kato's just the guy who makes his coffee but as they talk he finds Kato's hidden talents. An incredible inventor and martial artist it soon becomes clear they are something of a team. Seth provides direction and money and Kato provides all the actual heroics and nifty gadgets. They create the myth of the Green Hornet. An ultra cool villain who's secretly a good guy.

I have to admit, I liked this film. It was spiffy and moved along at a break neck rate. Seth really did provide the heart to the film even though he was also sometimes a jerk, but we tend to forgive him. It's a case of bad puppy syndrome. The car, the black beauty, is classic superhero pimping style. I'd like one please.

Aliens Vs. Ninjas

This is the type of campy craziness that the Syfy network wished it could do. Basically a bunch of ninjas are ninjaing about. There's a little rivalry between them all but mostly they are a bunch of good guys for murdering assassins. SUDDENLY!! a huge fireball descends from the heavens.

Well now the ninjas have to fight killer aliens of the "Aliens" school of extraterrestials. Can ninja skill defeat monsters from beyond? Of course it can, but it's still a fun fight to watch.

The aliens are knock offs but good ones. They remind me of certain burrowing amphibians if they were eight feet tall and had more sharp edges than a Lewis Black routine. They also have cute mind control fetuses which lead to an incredibly tasteless but funny scene as the ninjas are forced to pull out cute gummy fetuses from the throats of their brother ninjas.

Overall a fun film if you don't think about things, and why would you?? Enjoy.